Love this quote!!!

beberapa dari kita, (secara tidak sadar) telah menghambat pasangan hidup kita tumbuh dgn beranggapan bahwa dia tidak cukup hebat untuk ikut menanggung beban orang2 disekitarnya (selain kita dan anak2 kita)

that quote up there was my friend's quote for his status in one of networking web... very deep one.. and I totally have to agree with that ^^

kalo h0n ngobrol masalah pasangan... berarti yang kudu dibayangin tuh adalah sebuah hubungan... dan yang namanya hubungan itu pasti terjadi pada minimal dua subject... kalo satu subject itu mah... bukan hubungan...

jadi inget... beberapa bulan yang lalu h0n sempet chat ma beruang and doraemon (not a conference but it was happened it the same time). dan salah satu kesimpulannya waktu itu adalah:

"It needs one to make a love... but it needs two to make a relationship"

jadi intinya... untuk menciptakan suatu cinta itu ga diperlukan dua orang yang jatuh cinta... karena itu ada yang namanya love in one side.. cinta bertepuk sebelah tangan.... karena yang namanya cinta mang ga wajib buat ditanggapin balik... dan yang buat cinta itu dhewe ya punya kekuasaan penuh atas "cinta"-nya asal dia ga sampe mengganggu hak hak orang lain.. karena itu ada groupies kan...

nah kalo yang namanya hubungan atau relationship itu.. baru bentuk implementasinya... ga bisa dunk satu orang ajah kan yang berhubungan...

nah nyambung ma tulisan atas... jadi kalo ada hubungan itu... yang berarti lebih dari satu orang yang terlibat... so pastinya... segala sesuatu... adalah seharusnya.. supposed to be for both goodness... and that supposed to be based on discussion between them dunk... yang satu ini... h0n salut banget ma keluarga h0n (bangga dikit boleh kan... hehhehe)... keterbukaan jadi salah satunya... keterbukaan juga yang jadi buat kami masing masing berpikir lebih ke depan... untuk buat keputusan... dan pada endingnya untuk menjadi lebih dewasa... dan mengambil pelajaran...

jadi intinya... kalo ada sesuatu...sudah sepatutnya itu diobrolkan bersama... membuat pasangan kita berpikir... kalopun dia ga bisa kasih ide... at least he/she already knows it. Tapi masalahnya kita punya kecenderungan buat memikirkannya sendiri... mengira bahwa kita dapat menyelesaikannya tanpa harus membebani atau membuat sedih pasangan kita (dan ini dia... sebenernya yang justru membuat pasangan kita terbebani dan bersedih, karena pasangan kita merasa tidak cukup baik untuk diajak berdiskusi, atau sama ajah.. underestimate he/she kan?? padahal filosofi pasangan bukannya teman berbagi ya???), ini nyambung ama quote pertama "beberapa dari kita (secara tidak sadar) pasangan hidup kita tumbuh dengan beranggapan bahwa dia tidak cukup hebat untuk ikut menanggung beban orang2...."

hue... h0n keserupan apa nie.... ya dah lah... quote di atas cuma buat bahan pertimbangan ajah... buat kalian yang berpasangan... atau yang someday akan punya pasangan... hehhehe...

!#$%%^*&%^%$##$@#$% AaaaaaaRrrrrrrGhhhhhhh

...
...
...
T_T

Ego dan Anak Orang

Seminggu yang lalu, h0n dapat telpon malem-malem... biasanya kalo telpon malem2 gini, yang nelpon pengen curhat... liat nama.. hmmm.... ga kaget h0n... ternyata si Doraemon... suara doraemon sedih banget... ya iyalah... cewek yang disayang ternyata lebih milih yang laen... h0n jadi kasihan...


d point is kok tega gitu ya??? ngasih harapan... dilambung-lambungin... ampe nie 'anak orang' berharap banyak.. tapi in d end... dia di hempasin ke bumi.... braaakkkkk!!! atas nama cinta dan kebahagian... pertanyaan h0n cuma satu knapa ga dari dulu??? kalo mang lebih suka sama yang lain kenapa kasih harapan ke yang lainnya... dengan alasan dia seneng kalo ditemenin... ntar kalo dia ninggalin yang lainnya ini takutnya ga ada temennya... tuh kan... 


sebenernya ga juga bisa nyalahin ceweknya... karena dengan banyak pertimbangkan she finds the other one is the one... but still.... menurut h0n pertimbangan itu datangnya ga tiba-tiba... lah terus knapa ga dari awal... walopun h0n tahu dua2nya sedih tapi tetep ajah... kok tega si demi ego.. anak orang disakitin... demi kebahagian kita, anak orang kita buat hatinya menangis... no judgement!! karena h0n tahu ketika kita berbicara perasaan semuanya mungkin, semuanya bisa... dan semuanya mang bisa ga masuk akal...


I've ever been there and it hurts, but thanks to Allah for giving me the cure not too long after it. and coz I've been there it feels sad seeing if someone is being treated like that... 


dan h0n sedih banget, tau sobat hanny, ternyata sekarang juga lagi mainin perasaan orang yang sayang ma dia... kalo mang dia ga melihat masa depan ma itu orang.... knapa tetep dilanjutin.. knapa tetep jalan ma dia, bikin dia diawang-awang... kalo pada akhirnya kamu bakal ninggalin dia.... tau' ahh pusing mikirin itu, setiap dinasehatin jawabannya sama... ntar yang kesepian kek.. apa kek....  

sweetie, I do really hope that you know exactly what you're doing and what the impact... he is someone's child... what is your Right in hurting him?? if you know exactly you dont have future with him... for God sake, please  leave him....

must fit in!!!

dear blog...


lately I kind a felt that I'm not suitable for this company... got demotivated... and didn't have any passion for my work... then, I realize... I got to change it.. since that this company... whatever the work circumstance are... but still they pay me... so, I dont want to be paid without give any contribution... coz then.. I'll be questioning myself.. do I have the right for the money I get??


So.. up to now.. I'll be giving my best.. hopefully... eventhough it feels not right with my way... but I should give something, my obedience at least... I kind a like to compare where I work now with my previous office... the more I complaint it.. the more I understand... that there won't be any perfectly fit place to work...

I kind a remember my old post which said that the one who create happiness is ourself. Then I get it, why don't I create my own happiness in this office... so up to know... I'll try... I'll try to be as positive, as motivated, as my first time working in here... coz I dont want having many that I'm not supposed to have!! 


Bismillah.. a good will, InsyaAllah will be happened... 
happy working ^^

uhhhh.... kangen heavy!!!!

hari ini h0n jadi pajangan rapat, karena cuma jadi pajangan alhasil bisa chat sepuasnya... waakkakkaka... salah satunya chat with my beloved friend si xena... huhhh.. she's truly friend... knowing her since junior high... and our friendship still last up to know eventhough we went in different senior high and faculty!!! she's just something precious, trully my best, beside ms ada dech and beruang yach... hehehhe


we used to have this activity in YM, webchat... but since my laptop went error... that funny activity stopped eventually. hiks.... she's different with ms. ada dech and beruang, me with them usually maintain our friendship my conference phone, which sometimes we do it once a week. with her I quite seldom in calling her, since we have different mobile operator, but still chat and webchat is enough for us to maintain ours.


okay, we had this chat as usually... most of the chat were talking 'bout boy and our family! this time she had a confused thing with the one she cared. I asked her whether they already know each other or not if they're being in love. she said they already know each other. then i asked how come...she said she told him and asked for certainty of their relationship... shocking!!! wow... how could she do it??? hm... I wish I could have the gut to do so... huhuhuhuhuuhuhuhu... hiks T_T


then, she showed me some of their picture in Bali... huhuhuhuuhuhuuhu... Mupeng mode on!!! haiyyyyaaaahhh... I'm happy for them.. hope their relationship ends on marriage and happily ever after ^^ xena... you are a XENA!!!

Rokok dan Kebiasaan

Sore itu, setelah training, h0n dan 3 teman lainnya -m'ahmed, emprit dan teteh- makan makan di Enhai. Suatu hal yang sangat jarang sekali bisa makan bareng dengan teman banyak seperti ini, bisana sih cuma ma MRQ ajah ato Ike ajah... hehehhe...


Setelah menikmati nasi bakar, nasi timbel, dan tak lupa Srabi hm... emprit minta ijin meninggalkan kami sebentar, dan bisa ketebak mo ngapain. Yup, si emprit mo ngerokok, dan berhubung diantara kami berempat cuma emprit yang merokok, so demi menghormati kami (baca: menghindari hardikan kami), emprit ijin keluar.


nah, ketika si emprit ini keluar bentar inilah, kami berdiskusi seru. diawali dengan pertanyaan h0n mengenai kebiasaan perokok itu, setelah selesai makan pasti merokok. dengan semangat m'ahmed mengiyakan dan menambahkan.
"Ada dua saat dimana perokok itu ngerasa merokok menjadi lebih nikmat, yaitu: ketika setelah makan dan ketika Buang Air Besar (BAB, atau mari pake bahasa h0n, yaitu poop)"


h0n and teteh, langsung geleng geleng, kok bisa ya poop sambil ngerokok... yiaaakkkss... can't imagine that. thal ini salah satunya ternyata untuk menghilangkan bau poop itu sendiri.. hehhehe.. kemudian, obrolan berlanjut dengan kebiasaan poop, dengan pede, teteh memberikan statemen bahwasanya orang normal kalo poop lebih nikmat sambil ngupil (yiaaaakkss, maaf ya -mang kenyataannya teteh ngomongnya jorok gitu.. xixiixixii).


spontan h0n and m'ahmed tidak setuju. karena diantara kami berdua ga ada yang hobi poop sambil ngupil kecuali teteh hehhehhe... ga bisa bayangin dech poop sambil ngupil... wakakkakka jijay.. (imagine the most wild things happen during poop and 'ngupil' wakakkakA). coba bayangin dech, poop terus ngupil... hehehehe...  kemudian teteh merevisi, tapi kalo sekarang ini mah poop nya sambil fesbukan (wakkkksss.. hati hati yang berteman ma teteh, bisa jadi itu status ato comment dishare ketika dia sedang poop.. hahhahhaha)


Alhamdulillah kebiasaan poop h0n mah normal, kalo kloset jongkok sukanya mainan gayung tapi kalo kloset duduk sukanya baca komik atau baca koran (wah bangga nie.. kebiasaannya lumayan intelek hehehhe), teteh and m'ahmed menanggapi dengan mecibir.


klo m'ahmed lucu lagi, dia kalo poop suka sambil nyanyi.. hehehhehe... teteh dan h0n langsung hadap2an and wakakkakkaka, bisa bayangin ga lagi nyanyi.. terus ada manuver manuver khusus pas poop nya... wakkakaka... lucu lucu.... ada nada nada yang melengking itu pastinya... bahkan nada nada yang keputus... hahhahhahha.... stop!!! bayangin dhewe ya!!!


kemudian emprit datang, kita tanya kebiasaannya, walopun kita tau jawabannya, klo poop ya sambil ngerokok dunk... tapi kemudian ma emprit ditambahin ada satu lagi masa dimana ngerokok dirasakan semakin nikmat... (feeling feeling ga enak nie kalo emprit yang ngomong, maklum terkenal porno nie si emprit). "Ngerokok paling nikmat tuh setelah having sex" (tuh kan bener banget kan...)


tapi bisa bayangin ga... setelah having sex terus ngerokok, hmm... rasanya kayak tuh cowok nyesel banget ga sih... kayak si cewek ini wanita panggilan ajah... kalo di pilm pilm kan biasanya gitu juga kan... terus emprit membenarkan itu juga yang ga disukai ma cewek... kemudian obrolan berlanjut dengan emprit mengambil alih, dengan bahasan yang lebih emprit.. yup tentang apa ya... tentang seksologi lah... gimana pembuahan terjadi... gimana dapetin anak cowok atau cewek melalui pola makan... dan bla bla bla lainnya... tapi anehnya obrolan itu ga porno sama sekali justru lebih ilmiah... terkesima kami bertiga dibuatnya.. emprit sedang kayak guru biologi nie... ehh bukan tapi kayak profesor seksologi... hehhehhehe.... 

Nah sekarang, gimana dengan kebiasaan poop-mu... ahehehhe??


Overall it was nice hang out... *aduuuuhhhh mo kerja nie.. tattttaaaaaaaa...*

apparently I can't mad at you...

there is anger in me... anger that cause by you... it was so frustrated... and you know what... it was hard to calm it... it was too hurting to manage it... and now... when I want you to know... when I want you to understand how hard it is.. then.. I say no words... apparently I can't mad at you... 


Yup, I can't mad at you, even though you've been so cruel to me... you've been that deceiving to me...


Seeing taht you're not changing at all... keep my anger's calm... coz  I realize there is no use in mad at you, if you still like you used to be... that will waste my energy...


you know what, I'm happy with who I am right now... I'm happy that we can manage our frienship so well regarding what we had in the past... and hopefully someday you will change... coz I know that you are a good person...

ladies nite and d day after

it's been long time we hadn't had a ladies nite until last nite... the last time we did it... oops I guess before teteh got married... wow!!


last nite ladies nite was attended by me, MRQ, and ike... we had this ladies nite unplanned after the kare crab supper!! it was in my room... split the bed into two beds... then we were laying there... and it went by the flow... ladies nite began... hmm... I like having time together with the gals just like last nite.. it was so intimate... so private... the story began... the problem was shared... and gal's discussion.... the laugh we shared... the supporting opinion... the terrible opinion.. wakakkkaka... all was there... 


it was so enjoyable... it looked like a party to us... music by our laugh and expression... hehehhe... and then we realized it was already morning.... wakakkaka... who end it??? no one... we're just so sleepy... then suddenly no voice came out.... officially over!!!


and guess what... yup.. we have this problem in wake up... alhamdulillah... I wake up as my schedule... but the others.. wakkakka ... can't open their eyes!!! hehehhe... but when the morning already came out.. and the sleepers already awake.. and now my turns got so sleepy.. 


but over all... it was nice nite gals... thank you ^^

etika makan si h0n

paling ga suka makan sendiri... yup that's me...
dari dulu sejak dilahirkan kayakna... paling benci kalo makan dhewean... and it runs from d family, especially my mom...

ga tau knapa ya.. kalo makan tuh, maunya ada yang nemenin.. entah ikut makan, atau cuma nungguin kita makan... pokok e ada yang nemenin...

waktu sekolah... jelas ada yang nemenin makan lah... kalo ga ortu, ya adik ajah... ato malah kumpul lengkap buat makan...

waktu kuliah... ceritanya mulai semi mandiri nie... mulai ngekost... makannya lebih milih makan di luar bareng temen2.. kalo terpaksa makan di kost.. hiks... pasti kudu ditemenin tipi... huhuhuhu... paling kerasa waktu sahur... huhuhuhu...

waktu kerja pertama... kalo makan siang pasti h0n dan bontotan h0n langsung menuju meja si boss... biarin... yang penting h0n ga makan dhewean... hehehhe

nah sekarang pas merantau... alhamdulillah satu mess isinya ga cuma h0n ajah... jadi setiap makan InsyaAllah ada yang nemenin.. kalo ga ada yang nemenin ya.. lagi lagi tipi yang jadi andalan... huhuhu... kalo di tempat kerja dulu enak waktu di pabrik, temen makan siangnya banyak... sekarang di kantor pusat... hm.. sebenernya banyak sie yang bs nemenin makan.. tapi ga tau knapa.. h0n lebih pilih ngacir k SDM makan bareng si teteh, pus pus, and si bibi... kalo ga gitu.. ya terpaksa... makan dhewean d meja... hiks.. and that d most uncomfortable moment i had... hiks...

I wish...

I wish for a simple love life... 

I got so tired of complicated one... I guess I have enough of it... please... I just want a simple love life...

I just want someone who I love and love me in returns

someone with brave who will tell me that he loves me *and when I look into his eyes I know he truly meant it and it's real*

oops... that's it... that's the simple one... ohh so simple... can I have it ya Allah?? hm... bismillah...

ada yang lucu...

hari itu, Senin tanggal 15 Maret, h0n lagi pulang ke jawa, untuk menjadi seorang 'anak'

hari itu, h0n lagi otw jalan k rumah... tiba-tiba ada sms muncul... namanya ga asing, tapi.. aneh.. karena sangat jarang h0n dapet sms dari mamanda -my mamanda at senior high school-

mamanda ini aneh kaleee sms-nya, gantung... dan singkat "hunz.." tuh kan aneh banget kan??

setelah ditanyain kenapa jawaban yang paling aneh muncul "... eh tadi ketemu tari, tari blng hany mau engagement, hayo ga cerita-cerita..."

waakkkss... ketawa langsung aku.. gosip gosip... ehh salah.. kalo gosip mah ada sumbernya tapi ntar ditambah2in... wajar lah.. 

lah yang ini, ketemu tari ajah enggak... cerita ma tari ajah juga engga... kok tiba2 ditodong tunangan.... wakkakkaka... sembari jahil jawab ajah "amin.." wakkakakka.... sewot dech akhirnya mamanda nya... hehheheh... mamanda, whether you read this blog or not... you won't be the last person to know if I am engaged... hehhehhe... ^^

my funny lovely mom...

hehehhehe... ada yang beda dari mami h0n belakangan ini.. jadi lebih mellow, kadang jadi lebih manja... kadang malah jadi lebih dewasa... hehehhehe... mami ku sayang... yang sabar ya mi....


this week she is officially taking her leave off from work, both works! and I can imagine how bored she is at home, since that she is my super mom!! very love her work... and very love her patient... guess what she's been thinking while she should take home rest... "pasien mami gimana ya??? mami kangen ma pasien mami... kasihan mami tinggal..." hueeee....she's my can't hardly freezed her leg and do nothing's mom!!! 


and that situation... take effects on me... as her daughter and her friend to talk... she sometimes being so weird, by acting mellow, spoiled, and even act like 'mom'... hehhehe... call me minimal twice a day to chat, texting me worrying me... and it ends up with another text "why dont you reply my text sweetie?" hehhehe.... then I apparently have to text her... hehehhe... mom.. mom... I know you are worried, I know that you are lonely there... I know that you are in the anything's not right situation... and believe it mom, I really want to be there... hehehhe.. watching you like this will be so nice... and funny *evil thought of mine hehhehe*


Mami.. InsyaAllah everything's going to be okay... so be patient and enjoy at home ^^

Mellow mom

Lately I kind a like to chat with my mom, twice a day minimal..when it used to be just in d weekend hehe.. Just regular chat like we use did in home before sleeping or right when she wake me..mother to daughter things..

And in d end of d conversation she's always say 'I love you' uhm..truly touch my heart..and with my pleasure I dont forget to say 'I love u too mami..'

Hm..mami..wish i could be near to you..n be just like u..even better ^^ *see how we both look almost d same* hehehe..

be tough pa.... mom's need you...

hmm...
I just called my mom... my father was the one who answered it since my mom still praying... hear his voice not as usual... something bothering him.. I know... his voice seemed so sad... and my mom's covered it... I know...


pak... be tough... mom's need you... we need you to do it...oohhh... wish I could be there... 
Bismillah... ya Allah... we know whatever it is... it will be the best for us...

I love you mom.. I love you pa...

there will always be sunshine after the storm

don't know where to start.. just want to write something to lift up my worry little bit...


hm... i dont want to cry... crying is not for me... *I kind a remember this old song which always be my favorite in sorrow*

"But there's one thing I know
The blues they send to meet me won't defeat me
It won't be long till happiness steps up to greet me

Raindrops keep fallin' on my head
But that doesn't mean my eyes will soon be turnin' red
Cryin's not for me
'Cause I'm never gonna stop the rain by complainin'"

hmmm... Ya Allah... apapun itu... hamba yakin itu yang terbaik buat kami... Ya Allah... tiada daya dan kekuatan, kecuali kekuatan Mu...